Sunday, March 15, 2009

Are You Listening?

Do you ever pour your heart out to someone and come to find out you sort of wasted your breath? That less than 24 hours later the whole conversation is all but forgotten? No real acknowledgment whatsoever. None. I mean, it's nobody's fault, I guess. After all, you DID choose to do this huge "heart-pouring" during a televised sporting event OR while three kids are whirring by doing their daily house-circling OR sometime after midnight AND a pillow is under the person's head. How stupid can you be? Now--24 hours later--you can't help but wonder if the person is perhaps busy mulling over all the "life's biggest questions, sobbiest heartaches, wartiest worries, & freaky weirdnesses" you spouted off when you lost all control and let it all hang out, or perhaps the person thinks it was all a dream.

you are thinking. Don't you have anything to say about that?! No response. O-K-A-Y. Do you care? And finally Do you even remember HAVING the conversation? To which you can't help but think...good grief, probably not, and I sure don't have it in me to do it over again. Goodness, I don't even remember what I said exactly. You know deep down that your monologue of sorts was basically "all over the place" and honestly, the whole thing was probably just your way of "processing" through it anyway. But still. Wouldn't you like to know that something you said truly made an impact? That it was genuinely HEARD and FELT?? That someone has taken your "stuff" to heart and cares for you during your bizarre, troubled moment in life? ...


If that's ever happened to you, then you know what a relief it is when that seemingly deaf someone apologizes for not having responded yet, or sends you flowers, or offers to pray with you, or looks at you in that special knowing way--when you NOW know (just because of that little effort) that you are indeed connected. How nice it is to finally feel supported! Suddenly you know you're NOT actually spiraling out of control: that the cyclone that is your life doesn't have to spin quite so fast anymore. That you're in this together. For the long haul. And the burdens of your heart are not just your own. My hope is that YOU (Dear Reader) are living right now in this most cherished of places and that, if not, you know how to get there. (Pray, pray, pray.)

The Lord grant that you may find rest, each of you in the house of her husband!
--Ruth 1:9


  1. I can't tell you how many times I've had some sort of really bad day that turned into a complete meltdown, poured my heart out to David and then wondered if he actually heard what I said. I'm a lot more vocal and far more likely to express my emotions than he is. He's very linear and rational about everything. Ah, the joys of marital communication.... :) It's always nice to find out he did indeed hear me.


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